I might as well admit to doing a significant amount of crying last Friday when an agent rejected my full manuscript for the first time, since I'm sure you already know it. The first rejection always hurts the worst.
I'm sure the second will be easier, as will the third and fourth and fifth. The sixth will probably hurt just as bad. The seventh will probably hurt worse...
I can't help entertaining fantasies of this agent calling me to say the email was a mistake and she's so sorry because she actually loved my book. This is what happens when you put all your emotional eggs in one unreachable basket. Well, one agent response down and one to go; if the other rejects me, I can start querying again.
I would have liked to email her back and ask for feedback, but I've heard this is inappropriate; 1. If she had feedback, she would have given it to me, and 2. agents often have assistants read queries and manuscripts, so it's possible she didn't even read the book.
The thing that bums me out the most is I want to be one of those authors who can tell the story of how agents fought tooth and nail for my book and how I was in instant success with editors and the novel became a bestseller overnight... all that jazz.
I know, I know, it's ridiculous because the chances are against a writer even getting published. But let's be honest; doesn't every writer entertain that dream? I would have loved to say, "I only had to query one agent because I'm just that good."
That happens, you know... to maybe one out of 10,000 people.
I guess I could say, "I only had to query a dozen agents because I'm just that good," which would still be remarkable, but it doesn't have the same ring to it.
Well, I'm going to buy myself chocolate and sushi because I feel I deserve it, and then I'll move on.